By Shreyasi Singh, Special to CNN
Editor's note: Shreyasi Singh is a New Delhi-based writer. The views expressed are her own.
There’s little about my life that should create a sense of fear. I’m in my early 30s. I have a good job as an editor at a business magazine in New Delhi. I am fortunate enough to live in an upscale gated community in a Delhi suburb – the kind of place that shields you from the daily exasperations of India’s power, water, traffic and noise pollution woes. I don’t even have to drive myself anymore – like many who are comfortably off in India, I have a driver. Yet, despite these considerable advantages, can I really describe myself as empowered? And more importantly – am I even free?
For a start, I don’t dare walk the few hundred feet to the nearby coffee shop near my home after 8 p.m. (Indeed, despite the wide, well-paved roads, it isn’t a pleasant walk at any time of the day). Too often, I don’t feel like I can stand at a crossing in Delhi and hail a cab without hunching my shoulders in hopes that my chest will be a little less obvious. And almost reflexively when on public transport, invisible antennae go up all over my body ready to sense the slightest unwanted touch or sign of harassment.
Even more annoying, why does my cell phone have to buzz with an almost suffocating stream of text messages from my family checking when I’ll be home every time I’m out after 10 p.m. – even when I’m in a car with a driver that we trust? If it’s like this for “privileged” me, what must it be like for the tens of thousands of women who use public transport every day in this city, or the many more tens of thousands across the country who don’t even have to leave their home to feel unsafe, mistreated or disempowered?
Of course, none of this is new – nor is it news to millions of Indian women. Sadly, such experiences had become so much a part of a woman’s day-to-day life here that many of us had stopped questioning the unfairness of how unsafe most of our cities are for women. Delhi, for example, has been dubbed the rape capital of India, with 17 percent of reported cases taking place here in 2011 according to official numbers that are believed to grossly underestimate the problem).
More from CNN: India can learn respect for women
In many cases we have learned to accept that we should dress sensibly if we were going out, that we shouldn’t be “stupid” enough to want to stay out at night alone, and that we need to master the art of maneuvering our backpacks and handbags into a shield to protect our bodies on public transport.
But for me, at least, this lazy acceptance of the notion that this is just the way things work here was shattered by the gang rape of a 23-year-old girl in Delhi in December. If anything positive can come of this truly shocking, violent incident – one that made headlines across the globe – it is that it might have acted as a wake-up call to the many of us who had grown complacent.
As the sordid details of the incident – in which six men allegedly brutally raped a girl as she travelled home from a movie on a bus – were pored over in the media, I felt angry and almost ashamed to be Indian. What good is a growing economy or the world’s second largest military if half of the population can’t venture past their own doorstep without complete confidence?
We are the world’s largest democracy, yet tens of millions of us are treated like second class citizens – last year, the World Economic Forum ranked India 105th in the world in terms of economic opportunities and education for women. According to India’s most recent census, the literacy rate among women is about 65 percent, compared with more than 80 percent for men.
More from GPS: The start of India's Arab Spring?
Fortunately, I was far from the only one shaken by December’s tragedy, and some tangible initiatives look like they may have been born from the public anger unleashed by the incident. As a member of the media, I found it encouraging that so many mainstream organizations took such strong editorial positions, and refused to let the story simply fade away. Indeed, there was a significant focus on the too often unreported crimes that take place against women on a daily basis.
More encouraging than the media outrage, though, may be the decision by the government-appointed Justice Verma Committee, which has spoken in an incredibly brave, non-moralizing and surprisingly plain way in laying out recommendations for changes to the laws that govern sexual crimes in India, including faster trials and punishments that fit the crimes. The committee has also proposed a Bill of Rights for Women.
Of course, these recommendations will inevitably have to navigate numerous delays and debate before they can be enshrined into law (if, indeed, this happens at all). And even once they are, it will take time for laws to translate into tangible changes in our police stations or district courts, which are supposedly the first custodians of justice, but so often end up being callous accomplices.
As I took part in a demonstration protest in Jantar Mantar, Delhi, following the gang rape, it became increasingly clear to me that Justice Verma can only try to help fix the official narrative surrounding women and crime, justice and rights. The more difficult – and sometimes uncomfortable – challenge is to alter mindsets and speak up. This means not just saying something when a bright young woman is gang raped and her innards torn out using an iron rod, but each and every time a girl or woman is treated unfairly in our homes, colleges and offices.
And for me, maybe by contributing to this fight, and speaking up instead of just accepting prejudice, I have a chance of finding greater empowerment. But am I really up to it?
© 2012 Cable News Network. Turner Broadcasting System, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
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Brava! You are fighting the good fight!
She is fighting- but what she really wants is to change our culture to that of a western one. Sadly- we are not ready for it.
She has to understand that education, job etc and luxury she mentioned is all very good- but she is still an Indian and in India we like our culture and traditions.
If you wish to protect the part of the culture she is fighting against, it is clear you are not a woman, who suffers as a result of this "culture". Hopefully you will champion the good parts of your culture and traditions, but fight against the parts that leave the vulnerable in your society unprotected.
Ado: What are these "culture and traditions" that you mention? To subjugate women? not allow them equal rights? That women can't exercise their freedoms? Or that they deserve to be put down everytime they do? WHAT exactly?
And even if YOU believe that this is integral to your "culture and traditions" please don't presume to speak on behalf of the rest of us.
I thought that in Indian culture every woman is to be treated as sister or mother. What you are speaking of is not culture, it is lack of it.
Not sure if you are a troll but Indian culture is about raping women a you are so implying ?
Culture is never an excuse for abuse of any sort. The things the author wants to remove from life in India cannot be described as "culture", only as a severe lack of it.
So ripping out a woman's "iïnnards"with an iron bar is part of your culture?
What culture are you talking about? All she wants is freedom. Our culture doesn't restrict that. Somehow the society has got morally corrupt and empty. This was not what Bharatiya sanskriti (culture) is all about. Please stop talking about it when you do not have an iota what it is.
Actually, if Indian society actually followed the traditions and values of old, there wouldn't be a problem of violence. The fact is that only PARTS of the old culture are valued. The trouble in any society are the losers, who don't feel that they need to uphold any of the ideals of decorum, that there are exempt from having to restrian themselves from any behavior.
The author has just raised her voice. It's doubtful if she really gives her question, "How it feels to be a woman in India!" a serious thought. She doesn't seem to be ready to make things happen herself but sings in chorus.
Sounds like the culture you describe is a culture that animals practice, in my book those types of animals are only good for slaughter. Anyone that can defend that type of culture where women are treated like livestock is an animal and should be lockedup permanently as one.
What is Indian Culture?? To treat our women as second class citizens, I don't think so. We have to change the mindset of the Men .Women are human beings and not property,as most Women are treated in India.
I bet you are a man. Indian men don't want to change the culture. You know why? Because then you won't be able to have your women open your shoelaces when you come home, you won't be able to boss around her and get her to do it your way, you won't be able to hit her and abuse her like you love doing. Sad, but Indian men think their culture is to be the boss around women....treat them the way they please. Sorry, but this so-called Indian tradition and culture IS going to change.
ADO: Did you really read the article correctly or are you part blind? She is not trying to change culture – she want to PROTECT WOMEN. Clearly you can't understand due to your ignorant response. How can you say that India isn't ready for this change? It's a positive movement to help protect women from close-minded men like you. I believe any country can adapt to a change as long as it's all for the better, in this case to protect women. Maybe you were raised by wolves.
Oh harassment of women is part of the Indian culture and is not going to change. Shame on you. Shame on your parents. I know you are not a Christian so you do not follow respect of women. Do you feel the same way about young children? SHAME ON YOU
That's a strange thing to say...I don't quite agree with the author when she says 'how a woman feels in India'..I lived in Bangalore , Pune, Mumbai and Hyderabad for quite a few years (at least 2 years in each place) as a working woman. I was able to travel alone taking public transport like Autos..yes, I felt safer in certain cities like in Mumbai and Bangalore as compared to Pune and Hyderabad and in certain areas of the city -e.g. Madhapur or Gachibowli in Hyderabad were way safer than the old Hyderabad...However, this lady can't speak for the country when she is really only talking about Delhi and perhaps certain similar parts of North India.
What is Indian culture –is the time of Draupadi –where a woman could be given away as part of a gambler's winnings or a woman could be married to 5 men? Or is it the time of Queen Didda of Kashmir -who killed her 3 grandsons and ruled kashmir for a long time? Or it the culture of Ajanta Ellora -where artists could go and sculpt anything they wanted without half the population talking against it or issuing FATWA? Or can I look at Jhansi ki Rani Lakshmi Bai -who fought against the intruders of her land even though her husband the king was dead? Or is it the culture under King Akbar -where inter religion marriages were allowed?
Based on your answer -the culture of India treated women differently through the ages. Just what is the cutlure of India?
Guys, some body said nonsense about Indian culture. All you crazies got a chance to criticize without knowing an Iota of it. India culture always respects women. These voilence and inequality is due to lost indian culture. Lack of sources to instill good moral as people are too busy to make money or fortune. You are talking about over a billion people. Where is the time for it? So, if you really want help. Make aa constructive critism. Do not talk about some thing you know nothing.
It doesn't sound like the women like your culture and traditions.
Indian 'culture' should revert back to how it was when it was under Brittish control. The country had a lot of healthy respect and law & order back then. Now look at it..
These days lot of so called 'middle class' or 'educated' women in India are reporting false dowry cases against men. The women who actually need help have no voice. These 'middle class' women have hijacked the law that could help the poor women.
The problem in India is definitely not the lack of legislation. It is also not the 'enforcement' of laws, like many Indians would make you believe.
The problem is ABUSE of law by the middle class – the very people who make all this noise around 'enforcement'. This is the most short sighted, opportunist and hypocritical section of India society.
First and foremost India needs an effective law to prevent the abuse of law. Everything else comes later.
You are correct-many of these people who respond here are not familiar with what is happening in India. They are using a stereotype that women are very submissive and they do no wrong.
But case figures in courts are rising and laws such as 498 a,b,c are deadly towards men.
You are talking about an entirely different issue here. The author is talking about women's safety while you are talking about certain married women mis-using the dowry laws to take unfair advantage of men at hte time of separation. Both are valid issues and both need resolution. However, this is not the forum for this.
First of to some of the posters down the list- women are not treated as livestock or second class in the country. Indian culture consider women as mothers and sisters. Further 1/3 of all jobs, education etc are reserved women and all they need is minimum merit. Laws such 498a,b,c and other IPC laws exist to protect them even though many use these same laws to hook men. Even then we have had strong women politicians and business leaders and community leaders. We don't have a burqa system nor are women not allowed to work or vote or inherit. So what do they want more.
They want to roam around in the night is that it? to drink coffee-is that what they want. They don't want their parents to call them-fine move to the western world then. Sorry in asia we look after our children boy or girl usually from the cradle to death. We find that great.
As for women in itself -why there is additional reason for them to behave is because-if the woman gets corrupted the whole society gets corrupted. Men is not the same-they can be brought back in line with some losses.Women cannot. T his is the reason in Asia women are treated differently.
There are a few who go to the west and they think a direct copy and paste will work. No western world has not family life or support and people are independent. Men and women in the name of equality nowadays cannot even live together as a family in 60% of the case.
There are start differences. The subject is not that straight forward.
Ado, What do women want? They want equality, and it is apparent from a number of sources, including the article and your comments that they do not have it.
No one is suggesting suggesting that a we copy and paste the western world into India. India has a beautifully rich culture and it would be a shame to have it eroded. However changes CAN be made that are in line with the culture. However you think women should be treated I suspect that respect should be one of those things. Perhaps you think there is still respect, but is allowing women to be harrassed without any serious concequence really a sign of respect?
Ado, thank you for mansplaining that men can be brought back, but women – poor, ignorant, easily corrupted and pitiable brainless fools that we are – just cannot. Dear Lord, forgive me for wanting to ride the bus without being groped by some loser. Forgive me for expecting that I can go into a coffee shop at any hour it is open without being assaulted. Forgive me for thinking I should ever want to ride a bus without being violently attacked and disemboweled by "men" who can always be "brought back." Thank you, Ado, for mansplaining just how wrong us women are for expecting to be treated as HUMAN BEINGS with EQUAL RIGHTS. And by the way, this is called sarcasm, you ignorant halfwit.
A woman who is working till 9 in the night in the BPO industry would like the ability to go out and eat dinner outside before going back home. A woman Doctor working in shifts may have to travel at 4 a.m. in the morning -she may have to travel at 10 pm in the night to respond to a medical emergency. A young girl may have to travel outside her home at 10 in the night to go and buy medicine for an ill child or husband or parents. And because not everyone in India is rich enough to afford personal vehicles, this woman may need to take public transport.
As per you this is all Western culture – this is part of the country's reality today and not any country's culture. You really need to wake up and smell the roses. Any country that develops goes through changes. These changes are not some other culture but just part of a changing world. Stop living in a hole and look out the window.
As an Indian woman, I am ashamed of all your views. Thankfully I know many Indian men who are much more sensible and understanding of women's problems than you.
" Indian culture consider women as mothers and sisters"
I couldnt help but bust out laughing at all of Ado's comments. As an American, I assure you, I will never invest ANY money in support of the Indian economy, and no American woman who has able to carve out as much money as I have for my life solely, I do not have children nor brothers, will ABSOLUTELY NEVER directly contribute funds to India. It is so laughable, all of you are so foolish, your men do not even know how to hold thought, I think something must be in your water. India women: Come to America and leave those freaks behind in that country; We want you here, don't bring the mentally handicapped along with you, we see how those Indian men here and we all arm ourselves against the mentally ill, at least in Texas. Hah! "We treat women as mothers and sisters" Hahahaha!!!!! Did you not realize they are human mammals first? No? Please, NEVER come to America, 85% of the Indian men I know are socially defected and are elementary, the women here 95% have the utmost hatred of you due to dealing with you in our gas stations and universities; Indian women: COME TO AMERICA! We LOVE You!!!
But, still, India sucks. That country is sh!tty. Just plain sh!itty.
Your brain says it all. Your brain is full of it. So why don't you clean it if you can in your life time and appreciate what the country has contributed to the knowledge you idiot.
the juvenile who actually caused the most damage in the r.a.p.e story will stay in a juvenile facility and walk in 3 years, if convicted. The commission that the author is all praise for, refused to lower the age nor did they suggest that the judges should have the discretionary power to decide who should be tried as a adult based on the severity of the crime.
Its True no Matter what day and time of the day girls from age 4 to .... is not Safe is Major india cities. Recently someone tried to lure my under 12 and Indian law folks were good to question the person and create the fear on the predator. What I found is every one has 3-4 cars and drivers, and every where new buildings coming up bringing in huge amount of work force into city and parents needs to be carefull with domestic labor to surrondings as regular updates about your whereabouts are communicated by internal labor to external person.
I am really not sure in which country or place is it to be very safe to be outside in the night... It is the hard work of our police force who risk their lives to let us sleep blissfully at night. This is an epidemic and sadly enough it has hit India badly whatever may be the reasons. The list goes on – right from Govt to individuals. But don’t say Indians are bad. They know to respect others and are very kind by nature. Others may term it as timidity. That is the reason time immemorial people has invaded, entered and stayed in India. And now a large chunk is staying there and hollowing up the society. They don’t add value to the country instead helping in deteriorating the country. I agree, only Chinese type of Govt can save it from further sinking....
So, has your pie hole ever been attacked ?
I have always read about Indian culture and their discrimination and violence to women. I always thought of how incredibly wrong that sounded to me. I live in the Dominican Republic (Caribbean – America ) and as I read this article, i can totally understand you, my country used to be similar in a way, because women were underestimated and sometimes we still are.
But Im not so sure, that the "culture" per se is the problem. My country has very different culture from India, and I too cant go out at night (or any time of the day) without feeling insecure, and have an urge to get home just because i think i"ll get robbed and just for the fact that I am a women who knows what else might happend to me.....
I too feel, like men has no rights to almost undress you at a single glance. I too get 100 calls to see if I got home safe. I am also scared to walk alone for the fear of being robed and killed. And this is not regular parenting worries, things here are that dangerous.
But if you compare my culture to yours, women here happens to be far more "liberals" in their way of dressing, place in society, in business, school. There is no "difference", but we still manage, to have a lot of women killed by their lovers, thief's, by violence itself.
Im just thinking, Indian culture is not the main problem, is commun sense that happens to less common than we think, and people who dont realize that women have the same amount of right to live in this planet as anyone else who has been born and they NEED to respect that.
Every American woman should be required to live in India or a muslim country for one month. Then, when she returns to the USA, after she kisses the airport tarmac, she can walk up to and apologize to the first 100 American men she sees for being such a whining wannabee victim when she never was.
At this time, it can't feel too good to be a woman in India since most of the current laws were made by right-wing fanatics who were elected to office. Then again, every country has a right-wing element in high places.
Don't write nonsense. The rules were not written by facists. This is a conservative country and her wish to walk around in the middle of the night is not any sense going to make genders equal or decrease crime. She mentions 65% education for women-she does not say that women may take of from education for periods of time and that is why the statistic is that way. But 65% is not bad .
Do you really think 40% illiteracy among women is not bad? you are a pig..!!
Ado,
If you are alive and not a bot spewing nonsense, I am afraid India has bigger problems than this article alludes.
It seems people seldom read before posting their response. 65% is as good a starting point as any other number. I did not say that it is high or low. But the stupid man who asked me about 40% i am not sure what he is asking. As for the other indian named chap-go get a life.
So you accept that the genders are treated unfairly to a great extent in the Indian society and that there are crimes happening in the city? You are literally contradicting yourself with every single utterance of yours.
The rules are not bad. Did you know women have the worst law that man can be afraid of in India. This law is 498a,b,c. Without proof any man and his family can be put in jail. Do you think that is fair? Further 1/3 of all jobs anywhere in the country including school is for them irrespective of merit. What else do you want? More laws-where will it end.
Ado, SIt and close your eyes and imagine deep in your heart of hearts that you were born a woman. Now, how would you feel about the way you will be treated and the way you are viewed and treated by the people around you every day? If you woke up a woman tomorrow, what would you not be willing to put up with? You see, as long as men are making most of the rules, then the rules may mostly benefit them if they refuse to treat other humans as they wish to be treated. India's men have to change their perception of women and treat them with as much respect as they wish to have themselves.
Jobs are reserved for women only in Government jobs. The private sector in india which is a much bigger employer does not have ANY gender based reservations.
Ado, you are clearly either sick or terribly dumb; I request that you write your comments when you feel better or in a state of mind that is informed (understood?). How can you talk for all the people in India stating that they want/do not want anything. Please get some rest
Ado,
Dude u live in india,1/3 of al jobs r reservd,ONLY GOVT ONES U NUMNUTT.nd those 498 laws r 4 dowry takers who beat their wife n so on,dimwitt,get lost.
Shut up, Quigley.
Appreciate you taking part in the protest. It is actually the time when the public reactions have to go beyond candle light vigils and protests. The current situation cannot be completely attributed to government as well. It is the Indian patriarchal social structure that requires change. Even the police and politicians come from the same society as we are – so somewhere their behavior reflects what's going on in Indian homes.
This lady seems to be writing with a particular mission in her mind. Your response says that we are patriarchal society-true the vast majority is that way nowadays. But there are matriarchal families and there has been that in our history. You also forget that in our society with good family stability- unlike the west women are given many legal advantages. This lady working and living in high gated community does not represent a society that is taliban type. But by using certain events to get more is the plan-I am sorry there are limits to which traditions and cultures can be sacrificed.
I have lived in four countries during my life, and in every single country I have encountered Indians, and what they have in common is the disrespect of women, Indian guys are worst than animals, they treat their daughters and wife's like dirt..
You sound like an idiot. Traditions can be good, but also outdated. If you want to go back to your earliest tradition, why don't make animal noises and live in a cave.
Traditions are only just that, traditions!, not necessarily correct or good. Just because someone decided to do something one way 1000 years ago means that it is right. Maybe you have heard of the concept called Progress
Ado, this is not "culture" you speak of... it is the blatant effects of patriarchal society on the women within them. I am dating a wonderful Indian girl, and the first thing her parents are happy about is that I treat her like a person and an equal. They actually prefer she not date any of the local Indian men because, as Bob said, by and large they treat women like they are nothing but chattle. Not all of them, but easily 80% of the ones I have met treat the women in their lives like their only purpose is to serve their needs. It's disgusting. Now, its not endemic only to Indian culture, but they are the most public about it.
@ Mark when it comes to culture and outdated traditions, more Americans should look in the mirror considering their love of firearms before rightly condemming others...
The Family at the end of my street is Indian. There used to be a huge disrespect for the women in that house. Then a miracle happened. An old Indian lady showed up and moved in. I think that she is the Mother in Law. She is a skinny woman who dresses traditionally. AND SHE BEATS THE DOG DOO OUT OF THE ABUSIVE FATHER WITH A CANE.
Whooooora I Lovit!
BobPitt is that the reason you have so many cases of domestic violence against women in America.
It is not just about women in India. A large section of its general citizens also does not feel safe in India anymore and are losing hope in India remaining a vibrant secular, democracy. One one hand brute force is used to stop peaceful protests organized by students against corruption in which several key ministers of the present govt. are involved. On the other hand govt. refuses to act against violent radicalized groups previously involved in anti-India activities. Celibrities like Ashish Nandy, Kamal Hasan, Shah Rukh Khan, Tasleema Nasreen, Salman Rushdie are being threatened by these radicalized groups for speaking their mind and in some cases even barred by the govt. to attend events. Even today, a girl band in Kashmir gave up after threats from an Islamic clerik that singing is against Islam. Is this democracy we are living in? The govt. is trying to stifle the voice of its citizens. India is becoming worse that the communist China. Even China has better living conditions than India.
If you think China is that great- try and organize a rally there. They will have your nuts in their chop suey faster than you think. Anyway since you like communists I am sorry that you cannot handle difficulty of managing a democracy of 2.2 billion with 45 languages and equal number of religions.
You are a jer..k.
first semi sensible thing you have said, yes China is tyrannical and not even to be compared. They are definately not a civilised and fair society . Though why would you want to compare with them beats me. Only fair comparisons to make with China, is Stalinist Russia. north Korea and other similar tinpot countries. Are you saying India is one?
China provides a Structure and Security to its population. These are key to progress and to establish a sense of 'fair play'.
'Liberty' and the other BS comes later. Security – Life, Food, Property, and Justice come first. China is doing a stellar job in establishing the fundamentals and slowly opening up to 'liberty' etc.
To Ado, you make me sick with your traditions/culture, wake up, we are in 2013, women are to be treated respectfully.....I loath Indian Men...disgusting!!!
Wow, isn't wailing from the tower singing? When I hear a Priest hum a few chords and hymms during mass don't you consider that singing?
ROFLMAO!!!! hehehehehehehehheheheh
thanks for the laugh ...oooh ....stomach is hurting.
It is not just about women in India. A large section of its general citizens also does not feel safe in India anymore and are losing hope in India remaining a vibrant secular, democracy. One one hand brute force is used to stop peaceful protests organized by students against corruption in which several key ministers of the present govt. are involved. On the other hand govt. refuses to act against violent radicalized groups previously involved in anti-India activities. Celibrities like Ashish Nandy, Kamal Hasan, Shah Rukh Khan, Tasleema Nasreen, Salman Rushdie are being threatened by these radicalized groups for speaking their mind and in some cases even barred by the govt. to do so. Even today, a girl band in Kashmir gave up after threats from an Islamic clerik that singing is against Islam. Is this democracy we are living in? This is mobocracy. The govt. is trying to stifle the voice of its citizens. India is becoming worse that the communist China. At least China has better living conditions than India.
I think it is correct to call India, an unsafe place for women just by looking at one city. Humiliation to women happen everywhere in the world. As a human being, these activities are intolerable. There are cities like Bangalore, Chennai etc., where women still feel safe to go out during night. what i would like to say is that this article can be headlined as "How it feels to be a woman in Delhi" rather than the published headline.
I completely agree with your comment, and your suggested headline. I have lived all my life in Mumbai and travelled alone after 10 p.m. too using public transport often after work. I would be careful travelling alone may be after 12 a.m. or 1 a.m. which I do in any city in the world. I also agree that in some parts of the country, its very difficult for women to travel alone at night as patriarchal society make men feel more powerful and superior to women and treat them as objects. But India has many India's in it. I believe the second para of the article is exaggerated if it is meant to apply to the whole country and the true reality is that some parts of the country are not as safe as some are. There is no city in the world where crime does not exist at all and the international reader should be allowed to see the actual reality. Having said that, I completely agree that lots needs to be done to better the security of women and create a strong deterrence for men to commit crimes. To restore our faith in the govt, the justice verma committee recommendations should be implemented as soon as possible
Completely AGREE with you, problem of woman safety is only within Delhi, Do't generalize it for entire India. In Gujarat girls can be out having fun even at late night by them selves without male companions. So do not say the life in India is same as life in Delhi. If she has so much of trouble with life in Delhi why don't she go live somewhere else in India where life is much more safer and fun.
She is complaining that woman literacy rate is only 65%, compare that to few decades ago when it was in single digit. We are making progress so try to look at glass half full and not half empty. Girl literacy rate has not become stagnant at 65% it is improving slowly but surely, so try to look at positive side.
it is true,i think it is unsafe for women to travel in public/private vehicle after 9 pm.alone.women r now courageous in delhi.however,they have to travel with caution.all the best wishes for womens staying in Delhi.
I am disappointed that my comments vanished because they were not politically correct-this censorship is really bad in the US. The article omits the main point of law and order. It has to do with Indian judicial system and corruption, not women empowerment.
The Globalists at CNN probably removed my comments because the article falls in with Globalist agenda and what I wrote contradicts it.
The same thing occasionally happens to me since almost none of my posts here are politically correct, rightospeak. One would think that this posts were being moderated by right-wingers.
So she thinks she knows everything by staying in a gated community and travelling occasionally alone in revealing clothes among poor society/people in nearby city outskirt. What a page3 high society lady..
Exactly my point she is living in a bubble with a car and driver and taking advantage of this horrible incident to get some attention. Would this woman want to roam the streets of Bronx or southeast dc alone after 10. some people just don't have any taste buds on their tongue.
I think the point you are missing is how much freedom from violence do women enjoy compared to men in equal situations. When you pose the question this way, you'll realize that while, yes, there are generally "unsafe" areas for all, why are there other areas that are only unsafe for women? She acknowledges her privilege, and yes, she may be a bit sheltered, but I don't think she's writing this for attention. Her points are valid.
I am an Indian, I do know, that the society as such lacks respect for women. I feel the pain most Indian women go through. The aim is not to change the culture of women, rather to create an awareness among men that women should be treated as counterparts and not inferior in anyway. At any point, its the women who sacrifice, work harder, deal with stress (at home and outside), are hurt (emotionally & physically), yet, never respected or thanked. My heart goes to the millions of women living and dealing with this everyday. If every man reading this can pause for a minute and think of all the things the women in his life do for him and respect them for it, I think that should be a good starting point.
How IT businesses expand communism and socialism in the most capitalist country in the world? The staffing companies are not checking well the consultants; they are only talking care of the technical skill of a programmer with communist and socialist ideas that in most cases they will mix with capitalist well known models in the organization systems. Also, they are no checking if the candidate has studies in USA, and in some cases it does not matter if they only have high school studies, the funny part is that 500 Fortune companies are using low level people when the complexity of the business world is really high specially with a new ingredient as IT terrorism, and also that the reengineering needed in the ERP is imperative because of the low productivity, no effort of cost reduction, among others. Technical interviews and staffing is done in communist and capitalist countries, thinking that cheap is better than knowing the mathematical capitalist models that have to be used in the IT systems in USA.
HUH?? W T F? How does this relate to the article again???
Paki troll, the English used is the giveaway.
India may be worse than many countries, but as a woman in US, I learned at an early age that the world and the US is dangerous for women because of our gender. I knew this as a small child, but didn't really understand why. It is a world wide problem in varying degrees. There are many good men in the world, but no one knows how to deal with the evil that is particularly directed at women and children. It is a problem for all decent people world wide and for humankind.
Dismal, obsequious demi******s whose gods have too many arms and legs and about whom entirely too many articles have appeared in the Sunday New York Times Magazine. They wrap their heads in towels and wipe their asses with their hands. They are unable to feed themselves and what food they do have tastes as if it was mixed with the offal from muskrat dens. Their culture is moribund, their politics dictatory, their economy stagnant, their skins sebaceous, and their social order loathsome to the minds of decent men everywhere. 'Sub-' is no idle prefix in its application to this continent.
Abusing another religion or culture is very easy.. If you do not have any knowledge of it ,please make an a** of yourself.
Every country /religion has its shortcomings.. some more others, less...
It is true that Indian men are quite gender insensitive... but things are changing for the better.. there are a lot of men in this generation who acknowledge women as equal counter parts... but it is a long way to go, not only in India but globaly.
@ADO : It is shocking that you believe it is "OK" not to be educated, Your are typing away all that coz you can read and write....now imagine yourself as an illiterate... how helpless would you feel?.... that is how the "40%" feels.... please dont say its "OK" ...Also...check your Vedas and Updanishads before blabarring about "traditions / culture"...
These days lot of so called 'middle class' or 'educated' women in India are reporting false dowry cases against men. The women who actually need help have no voice. These 'middle class' women have hijacked the law that could help the poor women.
The problem in India is definitely not the lack of legislation. It is also not the 'enforcement' of laws, like many Indians would make you believe.
The problem is ABUSE of law by the middle class – the very people who make all this noise around 'enforcement'. This is the most short sighted, opportunist and hypocritical section of India society.
First and foremost India needs an effective law to prevent the abuse of law. Everything else comes later.
Its hard to read anything past the part where you have a driver.
I dont know if you realize how much of your audience you alienated there. What percentage of people in India have drivers I wonder?
The tradition/culture in India is older than you can imagine – dates back to thousands of years. What's old doesn't mean that it is outdated and must be replaced with something latest. Women are regarded very high in India, infact they come first. From religious point of view, women are worshipped and the Indian tradition gives a very good meaning to "Mother". This incident is very unfortunate. It resulted in a death and a mourning family. However, media should not distract the viewers by taking advantage of this news and projecting life of a woman in India in a horrific terrible way. They should instead assit the mourning family to get proper justice. Women in India have more freedom than women from any other place, it is in the tradition, it is the culture. All you people reading this news and commenting in various ways about India, I would suggest look around where you are right now and ask yourself whether you made the right comment about a country that you don't know much about. CNN is not helping the wounded family get proper justice but taking this opportunity and projecting India in a bad way. They are beefing up the news to get more ratings. If you can take a small percentage of your time spent commenting here, instead pray for the wounded family to get proper justice, your time is well spent!
You are an Idiot or should I call illiterate, plain and simple.
You are the idiot- you have no respect for my peoples values-if you don't like it get lost from our country and lick the western boots or some other boot.
Ramesh,
I am an Indian and am not in the slightest, offended or threatened by this coverage of India. Your reaction is the typical knee-jerk reaction to valid criticism. "Indian culture" is not as monolithic as you believe – people, here's a shocker, act like individuals and typically pursue their own belief systems, which may or may not overlap. So, the notion that some ideals that most people in India preach, and seldom act upon, works to prevent injustice in any country, let alone India, is a laughable notion.
You my man, are projecting your own insecurities on to this coverage. If you are a man, you should be stronger than that. Grow a spine, because only men who can take criticism can walk erect.
You may be an Indian- but you are not a man. If you are one , you should be ashamed to be one.
Abhisheknair – whatever man now I cannot pic a walking brave man who will take criticism, without cracking-up!
Excellent reply Abhishek. Having lived in at least 10 cities in India -right from Gujrat, Punjab, UP, Karnataka, Maharashtra, Assam and Andhra Pradesh, I know that there is no one specific culture of India. There are certain common problems that we all suffer from -no matter what state we live in ..like corruption, caste based politics ,etc But there is seriously no 1 culture of India. The Jats of Haryana and Punjab dont allow inter gotra marriage –other states prefer it. Understanding India is crazy even for widely travelled and experienced people like me....yet there are these nutters who claim to be the people responsible for maintaining the culture of India -these are nothing less than the uneducated Taliban of other countries.
Ramesh bhai,
I understand the need to protect our culture (I myself am an Indian-American male) in the face of limited, stereotyped notions and summary judgments - without understanding the bigger picture. But I think if we can't hear Indian women expressing their LIVED EXPERIENCES of not feeling free, we're missing something here. Can it be true that our culture (Indian culture) values the role of women, and yet, in other ways, that we fail to protect women? I agree that media can easily dismiss the positive elements, but as men, we need to understand there is a discrepancy between some of our culture's values, and how those values are upheld or protected.
Look to America for the answer: Guns. Then you'll surely have an "advanced" culture. NOT.
You are a man with a very small manhood, you are afraid off losing your women to some one with bigger one and that's why you refuse to change you culture of abusing and raping women. I thought your cultures included fine music, yoga, fine cuisine, arts, nonviolence etc. etc
That was to Ado
By the way mine is bigger than yours- don't go through route-boy -you are not big enough for that.
Good response. This guy Ado is crazy.
You speak as if there is equality anywhere in the world. Please don't tell me that there is equitable relations between men and women in the west. This is the usual defense of the western a holes. Anyway if you think there is such equity give me an example of the stability of the western family versus asian one.
I will be interested to see how you explain it.
Ado, You are no different than the radical islamic mullah. Since this article highlights one of the may problems of india, you attack people who brings these prolems and creates an awareness about what is happening in our country. People like you are responsible for keeping india backwards.
Matter of fact is no matter what they say its is absolutelly male dominated society , women are treated as second class citiizen . In their own home male have freedom ,but they have different standard for females.
Gulshan are you talking about your home, I am sorry your father did not treat your mother right. Where i come from, I have never seen women treated badly. by the way even in America there are homes where men treat their women badly, in some cases as in Utah the polygamist treat them worse then cattle.
After reading this article..for a moment it brought back my not so good memories of travelling in Delhi. It reminded me my fears in my own country. I feel sorry for the state of women in India specially the ones who have to travel to work using public transport. I left my own country for better opportunities abroad. But if I admit – partly the reason was not feeling safe in my own country. Specifically, travelling in Delhi was nightmare whether day or night. I always felt vulnerable from the prying eyes. I always question – Will there be a day where women will be as free as men?
Guns are the answer to all these problems. If dirt bag bothers you, shoot him. Problem solved!!!!
Yes perhaps the dirt bags will shoot you first before raping you.
Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands.
– Clint Eastwood
Thank you for being brave enough to write this.
there is nothing brave about his article, although I think most of the stuff the author mentioned is true. It's not as if a radical muslim cleric would issue a fatwa against this author for writing this stuff. India is not a muslim country.
I (a single woman in my 30s) just returned from a 2-week trip to Delhi, and didn't have any problems with traveling on public transport either with my mother (a senior citizen) or my brothers during various times of day and night. Granted, I was wearing tech workout gear so that if I got lost, my family could easily find me in the various bazaars, and it was easy for me to try on clothes etc on top of the work out t-shirts. It seemed safe to me and most of the people were courteous, giving up their seats to my mom and me. There were some incidents where in the transfer stations, during rush hour, people were pushy and I had to tell them to back off but that could happen anywhere.
Delhi in the 1980s was a much safer place to travel when we would visit from N.America during the 2-month summer vacation break. My parents would let me wander about as a child; my mom would travel on her own to the bazaars and we could walk at night in the various neighborhoods. I don't know why that's changed over time but everyone I know that lives in Delhi says that since the mid 90s or so, Delhi no longer became a safe city to live in.
Corruption by the police is a big issue there. Instead of enforcing criminal law, they spend their time getting bribes, called 'ghoos' in Hindi, for civil matters. For example, they will tell someone who has a restaurant that they are violating a safety code and require that the restaurant owner pay them 'ghoos' weekly. They will tell the juice vendor on the street that they need to pay them 'ghoos' every week to sell on the street. If you make minor renovatations to your house or say fix your roof and they find out about it, they will ask for 'ghoos' or threaten to fine you or demolish the property even if you are just making repairs. If you try to get a permit for anything in India, you will be sent all over the place unless you pay 'ghoos' and even then, the police will come and bother you.
My parents, after living in N.America for 40 years, don't accept any of this Mafia behavior from the police and keep going to court, spending more money in court saying the police have no jurisdiction to fine them or demolish the property since there are no laws giving the police jurisdiction. The police in Delhi keep making things up, but if my parents, who have legal knowledge and are well-educated and are well-off and are retired so have the time and energy are having so much problems, spending more money fighting this behavior, how can the poor fight the police? how can the middle class fight the police?
The police need to spend their energy on maintaining criminal law and order making Delhi safe and not on harassing Delhi citizens who are going about day-to-day life. 10 years ago, the Delhi police had an operation where undercover policewomen would travel on public transportation and go to malls, movie theaters, and walk in Delhi at all times of day and if they were harassed, they would arrest the perpetrators. It was very successful, so successful that it captures a colonel, a politician, and a number of VIPs. Interestingly enough, it was disbanded. Delhi police have started it up again and have already captured people of note. Let's see how many of these people actually get convicted!
CNN should highlight these efforts so that Delhi can't hide this.
Finally we have a woman who is supporting the country.
thank god for your obsvervation
sorry man, majority of Indian people are corrupt that explains why the situation keeps getting bad there. The good folks who are out numbered are leaving the country in hordes. India will always be pulled down by its divisions and corruption. The courteous people you met in Delhi are a minority.
The Status of Women in India – Its an extremely complicated subject. The status of women goes north to south in no time depending on the situation and the subject. Also Status and Freedom are two very different things when it comes to women in India. They are not the same, women may be respected but may not be free.
The real problem is at home, what is taught from the begining. In highly conservative and rigid house holds dosent matter that they are educated, what follow is age old tradition(Parampara) which defines a set of guidelines which women need to follow. In the same house hold the boys are treated much butter in terms of taking lightly of things and giving more freedom, creating a notion of boys or males being superior. This very though and idea is the starting point of degradation and a small boy turns out to be male chauvinist when gown up.
The second problem is abusive parents and bad influence surrounding them. Kids learn these traits and these ideas never can be changed when they grow up. Proper education to both parents and kids is necessary and needed. Parents need to be tought how to bring up a child so that in future the child knows its limits and respects people in general. Respect and treating women well and equal needs to be taught from an early stage of a child. Its not going to happen in one day, but lets start and hope the day comes soon when women may be able to feel comfotable using public transport.
And this... is why the 2nd amendment should be respected in America. Every human has a right to protect themselves... every human is equal.
The problem is not that Indian people have all of a sudden become more respectful of women. The problem is that due to political interference in policing, criminal elements have stopped fearing the law. This is evident in all aspects of life in india.
Cultural intolerance, boing down to fringe groups for vote banks, khap panchayat diktats the list is endless.
I meant "disrespectful of women" sorry about the typo
Hmm... Most of those low-life Indians are illiterate persons; so we cannot expect any better from them.
Wherever you find large numbers of humans........you will find substantial levels of crimes!
The human animal is the most violent creature on the planet, and we are made more violent, by concentration of our existence.
Corruption is pervasive in India as around the globe. Just as with wickedly immoral conditions that existed in Sodom and Gomorrah almost 4000 years ago, whereby Jehovah God brought the region to a destructive end (Gen 19:24, 25), so likewise in our day, God long ago purposed to permanently remove all wickedness.(Ps 37:9, 10) Many have no conscience, but allow greed or desire of their "belly" (Phil 3:19) to cause them to commit "acts of oppression".(Ecc 4:1)
In removing all such wicked ones, he has purposed to replace this unclean and wicked "system of things" with a righteous "new earth"(Rev 21:1) whereby everyone will feel total security because godly love permeates every place on the earth, with even the animals not causing any harm.
Isaiah 11 says that "they (the animals and individuals who were once behaviorally destructive) will not do any harm or cause any ruin in all my holy mountain; because the earth will certainly be filled with the knowledge of Jehovah as the waters are covering the very sea."(Isa 11:9)
ddd
Indian women have more rights than most of the Middle East and African counries. So instead of saying bad things about rights of Indian women, why don't you talk about women's right in Pakistan where women are not allowed to go to school without getting shot and marry the girls before they are even mature.
India has an unequal society where only a quarter of the population hogs most of the opportunities. The only way to maintain this inequality is by a brute police force, which is a legacy from British times. This is what the Brits used to subjugate the ppopulation and meet their ends. Law and order from a western sense of this process was only maintained in urban settings, even after independence. The rapid urbanisation of the past decade has suddenly put pressure on this brittle order of the past, bringing the brutal and lawless mores of the hinterland in contact with the previously protected privileged populace. The only way to address this problem is by directing a huge amount of resources to upgrading the police and justice system and bringing uniform lawa nd order across the country.
US Children executed in classrooms here.
US Drones killing civilians; woman and children, from South Asia to Africa.
So who cares about this????
Strangest way to the marriage application
http://www.online-free-sites.com/strangest-way-to-the-marriage-application/
Like the old saying – "distant hill is always smooth". Women are always vulnerable whether India or America. I have been living in DC area for the last 18 years. If you are in the NW DC, great no problem. Can a single woman wonder freely in the NE DC in the night? This is right behind the Capitol Building!! In a decent Indian society (that number may be short) woman are respected for what they are and not for their curves. I feel in the western society, woman are treated like throwing the fruit once the juice is sucked out. Every culture has it's pros and cons.
RELOCATE. I WALK AROUND AT NIGHT ALL THE TIME WITH 0 CONCERN FOR MY SAFETY. I HAVE NEVER BEEN EVEN AT A THREAT OF BEING ATTACKED. RELOCATE, FOOL. THERE ARE SEVERAL EXTREMELY SAFE LARGE CITIES FOR WOMEN IN AMERICA. FOOLS!
In India the majority of the people in the cities for jobs n education r frm the villages! They prefer to keep the village mentality (atleast most of them) forever, for the good or bad of it! every village(there r lakhs of them)hv varied rules n regulations! A little educated people in the cities should peep at their villages, n see the progress made, specifically at the mental level! They cannot say, they dont know their village background! The change has to come frm the villages!
I think Ado is a Pakistani man who is just frustrated ..... And can't bear the thought that a woman can have a voice .. Omg she wrote an article and on top of that published it... There should be a fatwa issued against her... It's men like u who give Indian men a bad name.. I am fortunate enough to know that all men are not j@&$ like your great opinionated self
Ado Chutia hai.. Gandu sale.saying all rubbish
Thank you for a very well written and courageous article on behalf of Indian women and women everywhere. You are indeed up to the struggle ahead!
ADO and a lot of your like minded brothers and sisters out there. Please leave this world. Make your home someplace else.
You have no idea what you are talking about. Just mere facts and penal codes do not even come close to depicting how a sense of insecurity and lack of safety can feel. How women navigate through every second of their life under the collective judgement and criticism of people like you.
All men are not bad and all women are not good. But do you know what? Even a woman who is not good, has to worry about getting harrassed, molested or beaten by just about any guy in India. If that doesnt have, women are teased, about how their bodies are, what clothes they wear. Mind you, I am not talking about revealing clothes or western outfits. I am talking about salwars and saris? Have you had a hand slide up through your salwar while standing on public transport? Have you had your butt pinched or breasts grabbed, just because you have to travel from point A to point B? Have you had someone look at you with X-ray vision even though you have wrapped yourself in a saree, not exposing a inch of your skin, make no eye contact and keep your head bowed? I dont think so! Because if you did, you wouldnt keep writing these things.
I have lived on both the cultures and lived the life as a member of a VERY conservative family. My family didnt worry I would do something wrong. My family worried that I would have to bear the fruit of some guys misdeed.
True, that could happen anywhere. But no where have I ever felt more unsafe and more cornered than in India, growing up.
I might have wanted to wear western outfits atleast once, but never did! And despite that docile, submissive and protected environment, I too have been molested and harrassed
God save our country from people who think the way you do.
Unfortunately democracy has given nothing to India.
Like being a Christian in Saudi Arabia
As an Indian-born woman living in the US
Thank GOD i migrated here 12 years ago! I think India is truly a POS – if my relatives weren't living there I WOULD NEVER GO BACK
Its HELL on EARTH for women
Sare Jahan se acha?? BS!!!
Really! Shame on you! Like any place is safe these days....Have you not been following the news in this country. Traitors like you should never be given any place in our country. You have no respect for your birth country; how on earth will you respect or understand the essence of being an American. You disgust me!
Yes!! Really Meredith!!
You have no right to talk about it as you have never lived in India so SHUT UP! You should be shamed calling yourself a woman.
If you have never lived you cannot talk- no go back to your cheeseburger and SHUT UP
Living in India has got it's good and bad parts for women and men. The author is yet another female that is joining the Whine Wagon and pile on India much to the satisfaction of the western readers. These women betray their own dear country unfortunately by selling it short. There are many privileges that women have in India that the west will never provide them. The Western society is money oriented and individualistic. The families in India for example are very protective of their women and most women I believe enjoy that environment. There are some feminazis of course who take advantage of some recent unfortunate and sad events as a ruse to smear the country in a wrong manner. It is definitely a breath of fresh air I am sure for every foreigner who visits India from the west and feels the love in the country for all.
Ado and LegalIsRight both are cowards. They can only talk rubbish to get popularity. There are things bad or good in all the country and sociaty. Sociaty is made out of people living in the country. Change is required but it takes time and things are changing. We can not just be in our safe net and indicating others mistake.
Ado nonsense talks about culture, first check from where you have come and what is your back ground. Do you mind searching on google who is your dad?
Anything which is good for human being (Men + Women) is a good culture to adopt whether it is in India, Pakistan or US/ Europe. Whether something is bad depends on individual and not on a sociaty.
When it comes to our own people then we forget all the culture and rules and look for a safe place for them. The condition of India is not such bad. We only have onething to fix and that is corruction among politicians and Govt officials.
Be the change we want to see in the world... and first lets look at ourselves and correct us beofre we go and correct others.
I totally disagree with you mam...you cannot paint whole india with the things you are seeing in delhi.. Yes there are problems, but aren't they not everywhere. as a writer what you need to tell through this amazing platform called CNN that hey!! we have problems in india but we are working on it...tell me one city in whole damn world which says its safest..NONE.. as an indian, i trust my religion, culture and people.. It might take time, but we will be winner.
And for pathetic indians living in US, posting absolute ridiculous comments against India...i know what we are here considering i also live in US..so stop trolling and be positive....and dont worry about green cards:-)
Since when is attacking women a part of anyone's culture? Perhaps I should re-phrase that question before the obvious idiotic comments follow. Protecting the safety of women should NEVER be a issue of culture, but a issue of humanity. You do want that to exist in your country right? The fact that you would throw western culture into the discussion tells me your head is elsewhere and not on this article..
So basically the culture has turned to be that of looters and pillagers. Take what you can from who you can. If it is a man, pick his pocket, if woman, grope her. Till there is more of moral education, and better enforcement of law, nothing will change.
grow some ovaries
you are the heckler of your own accord
sputtering can’ts and excuses
The product of growth but you cut the umbilical cord
you deemed your effort uslessless
you’re the brick wall you stare at in dismay
arms crossed and you claim the struggle to tear it down
quoting queens, but content to be the paulper that you play
heavy is the head that bears this crown
are you satisfied with mediocracy?
bearing the future. and still you cower?
you’re responsible for a legacy
meekly, waiting for the prince to asend your tower?
rescuse youreself, you’re not as feeble as they lie
and there’s nothing charming about he who hates progression
there’s strength in eyes that sometimes cry
because emotion is not equalalent to concession
You are a role model, DO NOT accept his role for you.
and when your competence comes into question
know that the opposition is untrue.
introduce their words to their digestion
your reply to adversity is what defines you
do not bend to structures meant to contain
your potentail ends where your nerves do.
only you may govern that which you can obtain.
-kayseerenee
Barbaric country this India.
Finally senseless ideas from Indians just stopped! Just accept that you Indians dont know how to respect women. You all are animals.
Yes my sister, you are indeed up to the fight. Voicing your opinion is the cornerstone of the new India you wish to build. Shreyasi Singh, I pray for your safety and that of the many women and girls in your country. I hope that this is the beginning you seek.
Hello,
I am from India. I get molested everyday in some or the other way. Indian men are animals who take advantage of women as soon as they know they are alone. When I am on the road trying to get to somewhere suddenly the road becomes empty and the guy in the road takes advantage and tries to dash me or touch me and pass like they didn't do it on purpose. I am a teenager and I dont have a boy friend because I am fat and its pretty scary to be lonely girl in India. I dont have no one who can help me. And I am literally tired of fighting with every1 that does that to me. I am literally so tired of these that I want to suicide. Is there any1 who can help me?
Oh!I love to visit India someday, when it's safer. It's very sad that a country with a very rich tradition and culture (yes, I believe it's not all bad) and very rich literature is not safe for tourists or for women.