December 29th, 2014
03:52 PM ET

Why giving shouldn't be a solitary activity

By Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn

Editor's note: Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn are the authors of A Path Appears: Transforming Lives, Creating Opportunity. This is the second in a series of three guest posts.

Secular people often make giving a solitary activity at the end of the year, one that feels like a sacrifice. That’s the wrong way to think about giving back. We learned a lot from churches and temples and the way they turn giving into an enjoyable, uplifting social activity. Our profile of a master pastor at a mega-church, Bill Hybels, reveals some of the magic he employs.  We all are social animals and when we do things with a group of people we like, the activity becomes more fun.

So form a book club and engage in a few volunteer or giving activities together—or link your book club to Book Clubs for Change, Choose a need in your community or an area of the world that you all care about. Then choose a topic and an organization you might work with. Or maybe consider an on-location trip to the area and meet some of the people you want to help?

Or join a chapter of Dining for Women, which is one of the secular organizations that borrows from the religious notion of fellowship and joyous giving for a cause.  DFW has guests bring a pot luck dish to a host's home and then they all donate the money they would spend at a restaurant to a chosen cause empowering women worldwide.   Some groups have a subcommittee screen a list of finalists and the group votes on a final selection. In A Path Appears, we list some other great organizations—there’s even one called Beer for Books—that make giving a social and fun occasion.

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  1. banasy©


    I lost the capability to "cycle" 13 years ago when I had cancer.
    You know this. I pray you remember it.

    If you ever say something so misogynistically condescending to me again....just don't.

    I realize you enjoy causing pain in others; that's your schaedenfruede. I get that, but stop it, all right?

    Stop crossing that line, please. My language on the first blog is nothing you haven't said yourself, and coming from someone who calls me a cunt on a regular basis, is rather hilarious.

    Be grateful it wasn't directed at you.

    It can be, if you keep crossing the line of impropriety concerning me, my husband, my children, my friends, and my past, both historical and medical.

    Knock. It. Off.


    January 12, 2015 at 8:40 pm |
  2. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Whoa! I sooooo agree!

    January 12, 2015 at 8:57 pm |
  3. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Ya know only a P U S S Y makes fun of a woman who has had cancer!

    January 12, 2015 at 9:09 pm |
  4. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Damn you are one damaged mofo!

    January 12, 2015 at 9:35 pm |
  5. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    And yea i expect you wont comment until the middle of the night. Much easier to not face the music that way huh? SHAME on you philip!!!!

    January 12, 2015 at 10:42 pm |
    • Philip

      I am hardly EVER here in the middle of the night CHRISSY. I'm usually asleep by 10 and awake at 5am. And I ain't afraid of nobody. So I have no idea what makes you think I am. Again, Sheesh.

      January 13, 2015 at 8:26 am |
  6. Philip

    What about my Bad hair day comment? Aren't you gals going to read into it too?
    I was just dumbfounded at the language you were using, banasy. Sheesh.

    January 13, 2015 at 8:21 am |
    • banasy©

      It was in direct reference to his post that was on the page before; claiming he could not write that word, and others; claiming he also invented free speech.

      January 13, 2015 at 10:01 am |
    • banasy©

      You asked me directly if I was cycling, Philip; you could have left it at "Holy crap, @banasy! Such language!", but chose to comment further.

      If you were so "dumbfounded", why the extra exposition? I think we know the answer to that; especially since you've used language such as that on here, also. It was a gratuitous shot at me that was unecessary, yet gives a fuller picture of the way you think of me, and women, in general.

      My post above pretty much says it all. So, you further bury yourself in explanations that are meaningless to what you said in the first place; fuller picture, indeed.

      January 13, 2015 at 10:17 am |
  7. Philip

    Lol. I remember 2 or 3 years ago writing a piece about women who cycle together, and suggesting that it might be possible that if they hang-out on news blogs together long enough...electronic cycle synchronization might be possible. he he

    January 13, 2015 at 8:30 am |
    • banasy©

      I also told you then, as well as personal texts before I blocked you, that I lost the capability.

      Typically, I see that you ignored that, too.

      No, it is not possible for women to "cycle electronically." If you don't know anything about women's physiology, you probably should find out before commenting.

      January 13, 2015 at 10:07 am |
  8. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Philip obviously you DONT read mine! I told you the other day that once those threads get so big i CANNOT get on them!

    January 13, 2015 at 9:57 am |
  9. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    And i said the middle of the night because when you are being NASTY to us thats generally when you the middd of the night! And sometimes the THINGS you say...SHOULD make you afraid! SERIOUSLY!

    January 13, 2015 at 10:01 am |
  10. Philip

    Keep in mind that I my personal exact screen name is among the most heavily stolen names on this blog. And I have bad hair days too.

    January 13, 2015 at 10:23 am |
    • banasy©

      Of course men have bad hair days.

      Keep in mind that there are icons that I can see to tell me when it is you and when it is not; that explanation is hardly useful in light of this technology.

      TJI wasn't formatted that way; GPS is.
      I also know how Adam changes his icon. It isn't device-related.

      (It's not being a private detective. It's clearly in front of my eyes.)

      I know when it is you, Philip.

      January 13, 2015 at 10:30 am |
  11. Philip

    Would it be ok with you ladies if for one day we talked about something else besides each other?

    January 13, 2015 at 10:24 am |
  12. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Yea WHAT do you want to talk about? Cant answer the question until i KNOW what it is youre asking.

    January 13, 2015 at 10:49 am |
  13. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Yea WHAT do you want to talk about? Cant answer the question until i KNOW what it is youre asking. But if you keep it pleasant than im game.

    January 13, 2015 at 10:50 am |
  14. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Sorry bout the duplicate posts. I may have to go to a road less traveled very soon i mentioned here in yesterdays posts.

    January 13, 2015 at 10:53 am |
  15. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Hmmm i guess he drew a blank on that.

    January 13, 2015 at 10:57 am |
  16. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Lmao ok i do not have the time nor energy for coulda, woulda, shoulda's! C'yall later.

    January 13, 2015 at 11:09 am |
  17. Philip

    The post war economy boomed because of an illegal US government operation Paperclip that smuggled hundreds of bright minded NAZI war criminals into the USA where they went to work for places like Chase Manhattan Bank, Bayer Pharmaceuticals, NASA, the Ford Motor Corporation, etc etc etc teaching Americans how to do things like build a rocket ship, build flying saucers, jet engines, synthetic oil, build more cars faster and better, and mass produce aspirin along with various petrochemicals we call "pharmacy products". The economy boomed. Aspirins sales were up and legalized for use by children.

    January 13, 2015 at 11:17 am |
    • banasy©

      Okay. At least you are acknowledging the post war economy was booming and that the words "In God We Trust" were not added because people were remembering the Depression; rather as a show of power during the Red Scare.

      January 13, 2015 at 11:35 am |
      • Philip

        No. Like I said, your national motto "In God We Trust" was printed on money to make people think there is a connection between God and US currency. That you could trust money the same as you trust God.

        January 13, 2015 at 11:43 am |
      • banasy©

        No. In God We Trust was printed on paper money as a direct result of the threat of Communism (which aknowledges no God) to a Christian majority nation to reaffirm their faith IN God.

        January 13, 2015 at 11:59 am |
  18. Philip

    US Navy war ships were defeated by a squandron of German made flying saucers in 1938. "Operation Highjump" it was called by Admiral Richard Byrd. After the war, the men who designed and manufactured flying saucers in Germany were smuggled into the USA and are still building flying oddball machines in the secret underground manufacturing facilities built during the false-flag "Cold War".

    January 13, 2015 at 11:19 am |
  19. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Lolololol OMG! CNN purchased a time machine?? Have a good day! Later.

    January 13, 2015 at 11:21 am |
    • Philip

      Bash and Dash, it is called. Post and Go. Cut and Run away. he he

      January 13, 2015 at 11:23 am |
  20. Philip

    Or we could talk about hair or high heel shoes.

    January 13, 2015 at 11:21 am |
  21. Philip

    People simply are not interested in talking about where flying saucers are made. Which I find odd.

    January 13, 2015 at 11:24 am |
    • banasy©

      I'd venture a guess that it is because there have been accounts going back centuries of people seeing UFO's (some that were even saucer shaped) that predate the Nazis.

      But of course if one doesn't believe in UFO's, one is unlikely to believe your explanations, either.

      See? Subjective.

      January 13, 2015 at 11:39 am |
      • Philip

        Yes. Even the prophet Ezekiel saw an odd looking image in the sky. But I'm talking about modern-day mass produced flying saucers.

        January 13, 2015 at 11:45 am |
      • Philip

        Those aren't my explanations, @banasy. Rather, those of men like Admiral Byrd. Don't even try to write this off as me imagining things.
        One of the first flying saucer manufacturing facilities outside of Area 51 that were built to accommodate NAZI war criminals teaching Americans how to build jet powered flying saucers was built right here in Colorado Springs, beneath Cheyenne Mountain, former home of NATO. But NATO was moved to Petersen AFB many years ago, and is currently relocating to Fort Carson. Yet there is an Ng fired powerplant that produces enough electricity for 250,000 homes still feeding power into that mountain. And I have seen 6 man made flying saucers fly out of that mountain over the years.

        January 13, 2015 at 11:50 am |
      • banasy©

        You wanted to know why, I gave you an answer.

        You are free to either accept it, or reject it; the same as anyone else.

        January 13, 2015 at 12:03 pm |
  22. Philip

    Our local TV news stations all have lots of videos of flying saucers around Colorado Springs. There is no doubt that they exist. The proof is irrefutable.

    January 13, 2015 at 11:59 am |
    • banasy©


      Sightings are around the world; they always have been.

      With the availability of cheap, portable digital devices, naturally more would be captured now than centuries ago.

      This is to be expected.

      January 13, 2015 at 12:07 pm |
      • Philip

        Manufacturing facilities filled with NAZI war criminals teaching Americans and Russians how to build jet powered flying saucers like the BMW J38, and later mass producing them. Not simple "sightings".

        January 13, 2015 at 12:14 pm |
      • banasy©

        Look, I know that you are very set in your thinking, however, dismissing thousands of sightings before modern building techniques is silly.

        And yes. They simple sightings.

        You're error is thinking that none existed before Nazism was born.

        January 13, 2015 at 12:28 pm |
  23. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Lol i mustve made a wrong turn! I surely didnt intend to go to UFO blogger! Nor 1938.

    January 13, 2015 at 12:01 pm |
  24. Philip

    Jesus was not being negative when he told a rich man that if that man wanted to become a person taught by Jesus, he would first have to get rid of all of his fancy belongings. How could that possibly be viewed as negative.

    January 13, 2015 at 12:11 pm |
    • banasy©

      Your first post on the first blog made it sound as if you, yourself were eschewing material things bought by money in the name of Jesus Christ; if you don't want to sound negative, proof-read your posts for tone.

      January 13, 2015 at 12:37 pm |
      • Philip

        I'm talking about what Jesus said and the tone HE used, banasy. And it was no more negative than mine. You cannot slave for God and for money. It is impossible. Like slaving for two masters. Eventually one of them will despise you.

        January 13, 2015 at 12:58 pm |
      • banasy©

        I work so I can eat.

        I doubt Jesus has a problem with that.

        January 13, 2015 at 1:06 pm |
  25. Philip

    Stop putting Admiral Byrds word in my mouth. Thank you.

    January 13, 2015 at 12:15 pm |
  26. Philip

    Bbl ya'll

    January 13, 2015 at 12:16 pm |
  27. Philip


    In today's vernacular, perhaps; renaming something does not mean the old definition of the term doesn't apply, still.

    Can you explain how Sandy Hook fits in with your new definition, as there were most definitely shots fired?

    January 13, 2015 at 12:20 pm |


    After examining the bodies of "dead children" at Sandy Hook, the chief medical examiner (who is also a member of the Screen Actors Guild, an actor) declared that high-powered rifle fire had killed most of the children. Later, the "perps" rifle was found in the back of a car without one shot having been fired from it.
    There are Youtube videos of a little girl wearing a red dress on stage with President Obama AFTER she had been reported as being killed. Also Youtube videos of her "daddy" joking around rehearsing his lines before going on nationwide TV and acting like a daddy full of sadness. He was a lousy actor though...did not shed one single tear.

    January 13, 2015 at 12:34 pm |

    January 13, 2015 at 12:44 pm |
    • banasy©

      I answered you once. I shall not repeat myself; I am not find of doing so.

      January 13, 2015 at 1:02 pm |
      • banasy©

        Good gravy; I am not fond of doing so...

        An edit button would be enormously useful.

        January 13, 2015 at 1:17 pm |
    • banasy©

      Although I will repeat myself, since Adam is playing.

      I’m sorry you disbelieve what millions have already acknowledged: that Sandy Hook was a national tragedy that killed many children (and a few adults).

      And his mother is alive and well in Idaho, along with a picker, right?

      I’ve seen the videos. They have been debunked; I doubt you have researched the debunkings, preferring to believe as you do. But if it comforts you to think the worst of everybody, that is perfectly within your rights as an American citizen, which, I notice, you have yet to renounce citizenship thereof., despite your complete revulsion towards it.

      January 13, 2015 at 1:26 pm |
  28. Philip

    The father of Newtown Connecticut school shooter Adam Lanza is Peter Lanza who is a VP and Tax Director at GE Financial. The father of Aurora Colorado movie theater shooter James Holmes is Robert Holmes, the lead scientist for the credit score company FICO. Both men were to testify before the US Sentate in the ongoing LIBOR scandal. The London Interbank Offered Rate, known as Libor, is the average interest rate at which banks can borrow from each other. 16 international banks have been implicated in this ongoing scandal, accused of rigging contracts worth trillions of dollars. HSBC has already been fined $1.9 billion and three of their low level traders arrested.

    January 13, 2015 at 12:46 pm |
    • banasy©

      I answered this also; I am not repeating myself.

      January 13, 2015 at 1:03 pm |
    • banasy©

      And I'll answer this here, because I suppose I have to, since Lister is being tedious.

      So that proves to you that Sandy Hook never happened? What about Aurora? Did that happen?

      Here’s a clue for you: if these men were so dangerous, they would have been disappeared. There would not have had such an elaborate freaking scheme to kill and maim Aurora and Sandy Hook innocents.

      Coincidence exists. I’m sorry everything has to be some elaborate conspiracy to satisfy you, but for heaven’s sake, sometimes a bleeding cigar is just a cigar.

      January 13, 2015 at 1:31 pm |
  29. Philip

    "NAZIISM" was born of high ranking Freemason Illuminati thousands of years ago. Their master is none other than an individual Jesus called Satan the Devil, and their mission is to deceive all of mankind into wanting to become rich and thinking it's ok by God if you become addicted to legalized petrochemical drugs that cause brain damage and weight gain. They want mankind to appear to be ugly to God. Physically and spiritually.

    January 13, 2015 at 1:02 pm |
    • banasy©

      Nazism was born in 1919. If you want to ascribe it earlier, fine.

      The fact remains 1919 was when it was officially formed.

      January 13, 2015 at 1:10 pm |
  30. chri§§y¥¥¥¥

    Lmao...manipulation...manipulation...MANipulation. Are you getting that @ banasy? Lol

    January 13, 2015 at 1:08 pm |
    • banasy©

      I am not nearly as gullible as his former sycophant, Chrissy.

      I investigate, and accept or discard, as necessary.

      Indoctrination is nothing new; the weak embrace it, the strong reject it.

      January 13, 2015 at 1:15 pm |
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