I have ta admit @Blue Saffron gave us all the thrashing of a lifetime. He took us down. I dont know what to do now that I have sooo much time on my hands. But at least now I dont have to change IDs so many times. Lol
Yup, one goes ten other IDs disappear at same time. LMFAO
January 30, 2015 at 8:57 am |
AIDS super virus facts
If you live in the USA and are an average American, you have a 1 in 50 chance of getting AIDS before you retire.
January 30, 2015 at 9:43 am |
AIDS super virus facts
...the more condoms you go through the worse your odds become, btw.
January 30, 2015 at 9:46 am |
Cuchumber
Yes. Thank you Dr. Philip.
January 30, 2015 at 9:57 am |
Philip
Those are CDC numbers. Not mine. I figure that most people who carry the AIDS virus don't even know it. The virus can hide in tiny little "cavities" in blood cells...vacuoles they are called. So tiny that antibodies are too large to fit into. And the virus can just lay there dormant for up to ten years, then "wake-up" and reprogram that blood cell's DNA to read RNA, and turn it into a little AIDS virus manufacturing facility. So my numbers are much worse than those reported by the CDC.
January 30, 2015 at 10:06 am |
Philip
In 2010, the estimated number of new HIV infections among MSM (men having anal intercourse with other men) was 29,800, a significant 12% increase from the 26,700 new infections among MSM in 20082.
Although MSM represent about 4% of the male population in the United States4, in 2010, MSM accounted for 78% of new HIV infections among males and 63% of all new infections2. MSM accounted for 54% of all people living with HIV infection in 2011, the most recent year these data are available1.
January 30, 2015 at 10:12 am |
Philip
While major media provided extensive and ongoing coverage of an Ebola virus outbreak that killed about 2,000 people (mostly foreigners), there has been a virtual media blackout of just how fast AIDS is spreading among US, how it is spreading, and exactly who are spreading it.
AIDS is about 10 thousand times more deadly than Ebola.
January 30, 2015 at 10:15 am |
Philip
By CDC numbers, 78% of the American AIDS epidemic could be erased by simply quarantining 4 out of every 100 US men. Sort of like Ebola victims were quarantined without their civil rights being violated at all.
Hey! We can put them in the FEMA camps, right? That's not Hitleresque at all. And, of course, you can head the Gestapo Sex Police.
Because, of course, you would have to figure out who is fucking another man, with 100% accuracy....because you'd never make a mistake (that you'd ever admit to, anyhow.)
And don't forget to quarantine women who are HIV positive, too. Away from the men, naturally, because of...reasons. The dirty whores may actually breed with the bi-sexual men.
You could re-write history to make it palatable, such as:
"The Nazis provided free weight-loss facilities to millions of Jewish families."
Get crackin' on that idea. You're going to Save The World!
Germany's Fatherland Security forced labor camps were not Hitler's idea you dummy. No more than than the USA's Homeland Security Prisons were George W. Bush's idea. Get a clue.
And you liberals always attack anyone posting AIDS stats. It's not that I'm him ophobic. It's that millions of people like you are hom static. "Stop mixing in company with them if you do not wish to be like them and share in their sins and in their destruction" says the prophet.
Whatever, asshole. Whosever idea it was is immaterial; the point is that it was a profoundly cruel and ignorant thing to do then, and, and it is a profoundly ignorant thing to do now.
I don't attack your stats. Ishow me where I have! You can't, because I haven't. I attack you retarded idea to let it keep going unchecked because you're too much of a pussy to admit you don't know how to put on a condom.
You listen to the prophet NOW, after you have down your wild oats, just like every other raging hypocrite does when they see their own mortality in their sights.
Fuck off. You're a lying hypocrite. You'd have a lot more credibility if you were one of those 15-25 year olds talking about these things, instead of the old has-been whose majority of your life is behind you trying to control other people's behavior under the guise of "God days so!"
Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office and sees The President whooping and hollering.
"What's the matter, Mr. President?" The Vice President inquired.
"Nothing at all, boss. I just done finished a jigsaw puzzle in record time!" The President beamed.
"How long did it take you?"
"Well, the box said '3 to 5 Years' but I did it in a month!"
January 30, 2015 at 11:39 am |
bobcat2u
Famous Presidential Quotes :
Ronald Reagan
"I am not worried about the deficit. It is big enough to take care of itself."
*
"I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency - even if I'm in a Cabinet meeting."
*
"Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first."
*
"Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours. And recovery is when Jimmy Carter loses his."
January 30, 2015 at 11:44 am |
bobcat2u
I missed one :
I hope you're all Republicans." —Speaking to surgeons as he entered the operating room following a 1981 assassination attempt
January 30, 2015 at 11:46 am |
bobcat2u
George W. Bush
"These stories about my intellectual capacity really get under my skin. You know, for a while I even thought my staff believed it. There on my schedule first thing every morning it said, 'Intelligence Briefing.'"
*
"Thank you for your email. This Internet of yours is a wonderful invention." —To Al Gore during the 2000 presidential campaign
*
“We’re studying safe levels for ar senic in drinking water. To base our decision on sound science, the scientists told us we needed to test the water glas ses of about 3,000 people. Thank you for participating.” —At the 2001 Radio-Television Correspondents’ As sociation dinner
*
"The candidates are an interesting group, with diverse opinions - for tax cuts and against them, for NAFTA and against NAFTA, for the Patriot Act and against the Patriot Act, in favor of liberating Iraq and opposed to it. And that's just one senator from Mas sachusetts." —During the 2004 campaign against John Kerry
January 30, 2015 at 11:52 am |
bobcat2u
Barack Obama
"If I had to name my greatest strength, I guess it would be my humility. Greatest weakness, it's possible that I'm a little too awesome."
*
”There are few things in life harder to find and more important to keep than love. Well, love and a birth certificate.”
*
"Many of you know that I got my name, Barack, from my father. What you may not know is Barack is actually Swahili for 'That One.' And I got my middle name from somebody who obviously didn't think I'd ever run for president.”
I wonder if President Obama writes his name like 'Barack HUSSEIN Obama', like other idiots insist on doing?
January 30, 2015 at 12:19 pm |
bobcat2u
Wait Wait, There's More :
"Did you ever think that making a speech on economics is a lot like pis sing down your leg? It seems hot to you, but it never does to anyone else." —Lyndon Johnson
*
“I just received the following wire from my generous Daddy: Dear Jack, Don't buy a single vote more than is necessary. I'll be damned if I'm going to pay for a landslide.” —John F. Kennedy, addressing complaints that his father’s money was buying the primary for him.
*
"My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” —Jimmy Carter
*
"When they call the roll in the Senate, the Senators do not know whether to answer 'present' or 'not guilty.'" —Teddy Roosevelt
*
"In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress." —John Adams
*
"Being president is like running a cemetery: you've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening." —Bill Clinton
*
“If I were two faced, would I be wearing this one?” —Abraham Lincoln
My favorite is this one:
"My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” —Jimmy Carter
Abe's is pretty good, too; he was very self-aware.
January 30, 2015 at 12:22 pm |
bobcat2u
George W. Bush's Resume
George W. Bush
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave., NW
Washington, D.C. 20500
Past Work Experience
* Ran for congress and lost.
* Produced a Hollywood sla sher B movie.
* Bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas; company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
* Bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago White Sox.
* With father's help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.
Accomplishments in Previous Positions
* Changed pollution laws for power and oil companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
* Replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog-ridden city in America. Cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas government to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
* Set record for most executions by any governor in American history.
* Became president after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 votes, with the help of my father's appointments to the Supreme Court.
Accomplishments As President
* Attacked and took over two countries.
* Spent the surplus and bankrupted the treasury.
* Shattered record for biggest annual deficit in history.
* Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
* Set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock market.
* First president in decades to execute a federal prisoner.
* First president in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record.
* First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in U.S. history.
* After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history.
* Set the record for most campaign fundraising trips than any other president in U.S. history.
* In my first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their job.
* Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in U.S. history.
* Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
* Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in U.S. history.
* Set the record for the least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.
* Signed more laws and executive orders amending the Const itution than any president in U.S. history.
* Presided over the biggest energy crises in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption was revealed.
* Presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history and refused to use the national reserves as past presidents have.
* Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans.
* Set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously take to the streets to protest me (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind.
* Dissolved more international treaties than any president in U.S. history.
* My presidency is the most secretive and unaccountable of any in U.S. history.
* Members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history (the 'poorest' multimillionaire, Condoleezza Rice, has an Exxon oil tanker named after her).
* First president in U.S. history to have all 50 states of the Union simultaneously go bankrupt.
* Presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud of any market in any country in the history of the world.
* First president in U.S. history to order a U.S. attack and military occupation of a sovereign nation.
* Created the largest government department bureaucracy in the history of the United States.
* Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in U.S. history.
* First president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the human rights commission.
* First president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the elections monitoring board.
* Removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in U.S. history.
* Rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant.
* Withdrew from the World Court of Law.
* Refused to allow inspectors access to U.S. prisoners of war and by default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.
* First president in U.S. history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. elections).
* All-time U.S. (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.
* My biggest lifetime campaign contributor presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds in world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation).
* Spent more money on polls and focus groups than any president in U.S. history.
* First president in U.S. history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.
* First president to run and hide when the U.S. came under attack (and then lied saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)
* First U.S. president to establish a secret shadow government.
* Took the biggest world sympathy for the U.S. after 9/11, and in less than a year made the U.S. the most resented country in the world (possibly the biggest diplomatic failure in U.S. and world history).
* With a policy of 'disengagement' created the most hostile Israeli-Palestine relations in at least 30 years.
* Fist U.S. president in history to have a majority of the people of Europe (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and stability.
* First U.S. president in history to have the people of South Korea more threatened by the U.S. than their immediate neighbor, North Korea.
* Changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
* Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who violated U.S. law by not selling huge investments in corporations bidding for government contracts.
* Failed to fulfill my pledge to get Osama Bin Laden 'dead or alive.'
* Failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of our country at the United States Capital building. After 18 months I have no leads and zero suspects.
* In the 18 months following the 9/11 attacks I have successfully prevented any public investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States.
* Removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any other president in U.S. history.
* In a little over two years created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided the U.S. has ever been since the Civil War.
* Entered office with the strongest economy in U.S. history and in less than two years turned every single economic category heading straight down.
Records and References
* At least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas driving record has been erased and is not available)
* AWOL from National Guard and deserted the military during a time of war.
* Refuse to take drug test or even answer any questions about drug use.
* All records of my tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away to my father's library, sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
* All records of any SEC investigations into my insider trading or bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
* All minutes of meetings for any public corporation I served on the board are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
* Any records or minutes from meetings I (or my VP) attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.
* For personal references please speak to my daddy or uncle James Baker (they can be reached at their offices of the Carlyle Group for war-profiteering.
January 30, 2015 at 12:32 pm |
bobcat2u
A small tourist hotel was all abuzz about an afternoon wedding where the groom was 95 and the bride was 23.
The groom looked pretty feeble and the feeling was that the wedding night might kill him, because his bride was a healthy, vivacious young woman.
But lo and behold, the next morning, the bride came down the main staircase slowly, step by step, hanging onto the banister for dear life.
She finally managed to get to the counter of the little shop in the hotel. The clerk looked really concerned, “Whatever happened to you, honey? You look like you’ve been wrestling an alligator!”
The bride groaned, hung on to the counter and managed to speak, “Oh God! When he told me he’d been saving up for 75 years, I thought he meant his money!!”
January 30, 2015 at 1:05 pm |
bobcat2u
A man went to his lawyer and said "I would like to make a will but I don't know exactly how to go about it."
The lawyer says "No problem, leave it all to me".
The man looks somewhat upset ... "Well I knew you were going to take the biggest slice, but I'd like to leave a little to my children too!
January 30, 2015 at 1:07 pm |
bobcat2u
A father and his son go into the grocery store when they happen upon the condom aisle. The son asks his father why there are so many different boxes of condoms. The father replies, "Well, you see that 3-pack? That's for when you're in high school. You have 2 for Friday night and 1 for Saturday night."
The son then asks his father, "What's the 6-pack for?"
The father replies, "Well, that's for when you're in college. You have 2 for Friday night, 2 for Saturday night, and 2 for Sunday morning."
Then the son asks his father what the 12-pack is for.
The father replies, "Well, that's for when you're married. You have one for January, one for February, one for March, one for... "
January 30, 2015 at 1:10 pm |
bobcat2u
What do you do with 365 used condoms?
Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.
Bush didn't "Bought an oil company" you liar. He borrowed 5 million dollars from Usama Bin Laden's and started "Arbusto Energy" and went on TV luring victims who all lost money investing in that little twerp.
He never paid Salim back the 5 mil, and Salim died in a freak plane crash near Houston.
GW Bush is an evil man and co-conspirator in the crime of 9/11. Swear to God he is.
And Abe Lincoln WAS two faced and in more than these two ways:
1. One side of his face was so disfigured that children used to cry at seeing that tall monster and his grotesque face for the first time.
2.) He preferred sleeping with men and his favorite man friend owned many slaves.
January 30, 2015 at 2:51 pm |
bobcat2u
During a recent vacation in Las Vegas, a man went to see a popular magic show. After one especially amazing feat, a man from the back of the theater yelled, "How'd you do that?" "I could tell you, sir", the magician answered, "But then I'd have to kill you." After a short pause, the man yelled back, "Ok, then... just tell my wife!"...
January 30, 2015 at 2:52 pm |
bobcat2u
An amateur magician accidentally turns his wife into a loveseat and his two kids into armchairs. He starts to panic. He tries every trick in book but none work so, in desperation, he decides to take them to hospital. Once at the hospital, the magician spends a sleepless night while the medical staff run numerous tests on the unfortunate woman and children. Finally, the head doctor comes out into the corridor to speak to the magician. "How are my family?" he asks worriedly, "Are they alright?" The doctor replies, "they're comfortable..."
January 30, 2015 at 2:54 pm |
bobcat2u
In a fancy Paris restaurant, there is a magical wish-granting mirror. But it only grants wishes if you tell the truth - if you lie, you disappear. One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead enter the restaurant and decide to try out the mirror. The brunette goes first. "I think I'm the smartest woman on earth." "POOF!" She disappears. The redhead goes up to try. "I think I'm the prettiest woman on earth." "POOF!" She disappears. The blonde goes up. "I think–" "POOF!
January 30, 2015 at 2:56 pm |
bobcat2u
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says: "I'll give each of you just one wish." "Me first! Me first!, says the administration clerk. I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone. "Me next! Me next!, says the sales rep. I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone. "OK, you're up" the Genie says to the manager. The manager says: "I want those two back in the office after lunch." Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
January 30, 2015 at 2:58 pm |
Cuchumber
I am a crowd. Odddd. Odddd.
I am having withdrawal symptoms.
Yes. Gw bad man. Bad man.
January 30, 2015 at 2:59 pm |
bobcat2u
Two Men were out fishing when one decides to have a smoke He asks the other guy if he has a lighter He replies " Yes i do " and hands the other a 10 inch long BIC lighter Surprised the guy asks "Where did you get this?" The guy replies " Oh I have a personal genie" The first man asks "Can I make a wish?" Sure says the other man "Just make sure that you speak clearly cause he is a little hard at hearing" "Ok I will" says the other as he rubs the lamp a genie appears and asks the man what he wants The man says " I want a Million Bucks " The genie says OK and goes back to his bottle and 10 seconds later a million ducks fly over head And the guy says to the other " Your genie realy sucks at hearing doesnt He?" The other man replies "I know do you realy think I asked for a 10 inch BIC"
The Global Public Square is where you can make sense of the world every day with insights and explanations from CNN's Fareed Zakaria, leading journalists at CNN, and other international thinkers. Join GPS editor Jason Miks and get informed about global issues, exposed to unique stories, and engaged with diverse and original perspectives.
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Hi folks.
I eat Indian s hit. Lol.
Oink oink
Lol. Are you commanche?
Or curry eating black indian?
Modi is londay baaj. His pheenus must be cut off.
I gotta tell you @Blue Saffron is my hero. He gave me religion. And a hole lotta love downstairs.
He is a beast yo chrissy.
Lol hey chrissy did ya know @banasy is in hospital for AIDS?
Oh, fuck off. Your stupid shit isn't funny. When are you going to do the world a favor and exit it?
I have ta admit @Blue Saffron gave us all the thrashing of a lifetime. He took us down. I dont know what to do now that I have sooo much time on my hands. But at least now I dont have to change IDs so many times. Lol
Had a great time gang rayping in New Delhi alongwith @banasy. Modi is great. He s ukked our sweaty bollz. Okay, my bollz as banasy as none. Lol!
Oh, fuck off. Your stupid shit isn't funny. When are you going to do the world a favor and exit it? Soon.
Who takes my name! I am in for an a bortion NOT AIDS. FYI
Yeah. Sure. I carried the baby in a backpack, obviously.
Adam, you're a fucking idiot.
A zz holes all ran away to India to s ukk Mod'i's wiener.
Yup, one goes ten other IDs disappear at same time. LMFAO
If you live in the USA and are an average American, you have a 1 in 50 chance of getting AIDS before you retire.
...the more condoms you go through the worse your odds become, btw.
Yes. Thank you Dr. Philip.
Those are CDC numbers. Not mine. I figure that most people who carry the AIDS virus don't even know it. The virus can hide in tiny little "cavities" in blood cells...vacuoles they are called. So tiny that antibodies are too large to fit into. And the virus can just lay there dormant for up to ten years, then "wake-up" and reprogram that blood cell's DNA to read RNA, and turn it into a little AIDS virus manufacturing facility. So my numbers are much worse than those reported by the CDC.
In 2010, the estimated number of new HIV infections among MSM (men having anal intercourse with other men) was 29,800, a significant 12% increase from the 26,700 new infections among MSM in 20082.
Although MSM represent about 4% of the male population in the United States4, in 2010, MSM accounted for 78% of new HIV infections among males and 63% of all new infections2. MSM accounted for 54% of all people living with HIV infection in 2011, the most recent year these data are available1.
While major media provided extensive and ongoing coverage of an Ebola virus outbreak that killed about 2,000 people (mostly foreigners), there has been a virtual media blackout of just how fast AIDS is spreading among US, how it is spreading, and exactly who are spreading it.
AIDS is about 10 thousand times more deadly than Ebola.
By CDC numbers, 78% of the American AIDS epidemic could be erased by simply quarantining 4 out of every 100 US men. Sort of like Ebola victims were quarantined without their civil rights being violated at all.
Hey! We can put them in the FEMA camps, right? That's not Hitleresque at all. And, of course, you can head the Gestapo Sex Police.
Because, of course, you would have to figure out who is fucking another man, with 100% accuracy....because you'd never make a mistake (that you'd ever admit to, anyhow.)
And don't forget to quarantine women who are HIV positive, too. Away from the men, naturally, because of...reasons. The dirty whores may actually breed with the bi-sexual men.
You could re-write history to make it palatable, such as:
"The Nazis provided free weight-loss facilities to millions of Jewish families."
Get crackin' on that idea. You're going to Save The World!
/sarcasm. Definitely sarcasm.
Germany's Fatherland Security forced labor camps were not Hitler's idea you dummy. No more than than the USA's Homeland Security Prisons were George W. Bush's idea. Get a clue.
And you liberals always attack anyone posting AIDS stats. It's not that I'm him ophobic. It's that millions of people like you are hom static. "Stop mixing in company with them if you do not wish to be like them and share in their sins and in their destruction" says the prophet.
Whatever, asshole. Whosever idea it was is immaterial; the point is that it was a profoundly cruel and ignorant thing to do then, and, and it is a profoundly ignorant thing to do now.
I don't attack your stats. Ishow me where I have! You can't, because I haven't. I attack you retarded idea to let it keep going unchecked because you're too much of a pussy to admit you don't know how to put on a condom.
You listen to the prophet NOW, after you have down your wild oats, just like every other raging hypocrite does when they see their own mortality in their sights.
Fuck off. You're a lying hypocrite. You'd have a lot more credibility if you were one of those 15-25 year olds talking about these things, instead of the old has-been whose majority of your life is behind you trying to control other people's behavior under the guise of "God days so!"
Almost Time for a Freedom Fighters list. Eh??
You're going to do it, regardless.
Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office and sees The President whooping and hollering.
"What's the matter, Mr. President?" The Vice President inquired.
"Nothing at all, boss. I just done finished a jigsaw puzzle in record time!" The President beamed.
"How long did it take you?"
"Well, the box said '3 to 5 Years' but I did it in a month!"
Famous Presidential Quotes :
Ronald Reagan
"I am not worried about the deficit. It is big enough to take care of itself."
*
"I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency - even if I'm in a Cabinet meeting."
*
"Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first."
*
"Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours. And recovery is when Jimmy Carter loses his."
I missed one :
I hope you're all Republicans." —Speaking to surgeons as he entered the operating room following a 1981 assassination attempt
George W. Bush
"These stories about my intellectual capacity really get under my skin. You know, for a while I even thought my staff believed it. There on my schedule first thing every morning it said, 'Intelligence Briefing.'"
*
"Thank you for your email. This Internet of yours is a wonderful invention." —To Al Gore during the 2000 presidential campaign
*
“We’re studying safe levels for ar senic in drinking water. To base our decision on sound science, the scientists told us we needed to test the water glas ses of about 3,000 people. Thank you for participating.” —At the 2001 Radio-Television Correspondents’ As sociation dinner
*
"The candidates are an interesting group, with diverse opinions - for tax cuts and against them, for NAFTA and against NAFTA, for the Patriot Act and against the Patriot Act, in favor of liberating Iraq and opposed to it. And that's just one senator from Mas sachusetts." —During the 2004 campaign against John Kerry
Barack Obama
"If I had to name my greatest strength, I guess it would be my humility. Greatest weakness, it's possible that I'm a little too awesome."
*
”There are few things in life harder to find and more important to keep than love. Well, love and a birth certificate.”
*
"Many of you know that I got my name, Barack, from my father. What you may not know is Barack is actually Swahili for 'That One.' And I got my middle name from somebody who obviously didn't think I'd ever run for president.”
I wonder if President Obama writes his name like 'Barack HUSSEIN Obama', like other idiots insist on doing?
Wait Wait, There's More :
"Did you ever think that making a speech on economics is a lot like pis sing down your leg? It seems hot to you, but it never does to anyone else." —Lyndon Johnson
*
“I just received the following wire from my generous Daddy: Dear Jack, Don't buy a single vote more than is necessary. I'll be damned if I'm going to pay for a landslide.” —John F. Kennedy, addressing complaints that his father’s money was buying the primary for him.
*
"My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” —Jimmy Carter
*
"When they call the roll in the Senate, the Senators do not know whether to answer 'present' or 'not guilty.'" —Teddy Roosevelt
*
"In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress." —John Adams
*
"Being president is like running a cemetery: you've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening." —Bill Clinton
*
“If I were two faced, would I be wearing this one?” —Abraham Lincoln
My favorite is this one:
"My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” —Jimmy Carter
I also like Abes.
Abe's is pretty good, too; he was very self-aware.
George W. Bush's Resume
George W. Bush
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave., NW
Washington, D.C. 20500
Past Work Experience
* Ran for congress and lost.
* Produced a Hollywood sla sher B movie.
* Bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas; company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
* Bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago White Sox.
* With father's help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.
Accomplishments in Previous Positions
* Changed pollution laws for power and oil companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
* Replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog-ridden city in America. Cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas government to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
* Set record for most executions by any governor in American history.
* Became president after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 votes, with the help of my father's appointments to the Supreme Court.
Accomplishments As President
* Attacked and took over two countries.
* Spent the surplus and bankrupted the treasury.
* Shattered record for biggest annual deficit in history.
* Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
* Set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock market.
* First president in decades to execute a federal prisoner.
* First president in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record.
* First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in U.S. history.
* After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history.
* Set the record for most campaign fundraising trips than any other president in U.S. history.
* In my first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their job.
* Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in U.S. history.
* Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
* Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in U.S. history.
* Set the record for the least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.
* Signed more laws and executive orders amending the Const itution than any president in U.S. history.
* Presided over the biggest energy crises in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption was revealed.
* Presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history and refused to use the national reserves as past presidents have.
* Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans.
* Set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously take to the streets to protest me (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind.
* Dissolved more international treaties than any president in U.S. history.
* My presidency is the most secretive and unaccountable of any in U.S. history.
* Members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history (the 'poorest' multimillionaire, Condoleezza Rice, has an Exxon oil tanker named after her).
* First president in U.S. history to have all 50 states of the Union simultaneously go bankrupt.
* Presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud of any market in any country in the history of the world.
* First president in U.S. history to order a U.S. attack and military occupation of a sovereign nation.
* Created the largest government department bureaucracy in the history of the United States.
* Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in U.S. history.
* First president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the human rights commission.
* First president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the elections monitoring board.
* Removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in U.S. history.
* Rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant.
* Withdrew from the World Court of Law.
* Refused to allow inspectors access to U.S. prisoners of war and by default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.
* First president in U.S. history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. elections).
* All-time U.S. (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.
* My biggest lifetime campaign contributor presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds in world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation).
* Spent more money on polls and focus groups than any president in U.S. history.
* First president in U.S. history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.
* First president to run and hide when the U.S. came under attack (and then lied saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)
* First U.S. president to establish a secret shadow government.
* Took the biggest world sympathy for the U.S. after 9/11, and in less than a year made the U.S. the most resented country in the world (possibly the biggest diplomatic failure in U.S. and world history).
* With a policy of 'disengagement' created the most hostile Israeli-Palestine relations in at least 30 years.
* Fist U.S. president in history to have a majority of the people of Europe (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and stability.
* First U.S. president in history to have the people of South Korea more threatened by the U.S. than their immediate neighbor, North Korea.
* Changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
* Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who violated U.S. law by not selling huge investments in corporations bidding for government contracts.
* Failed to fulfill my pledge to get Osama Bin Laden 'dead or alive.'
* Failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of our country at the United States Capital building. After 18 months I have no leads and zero suspects.
* In the 18 months following the 9/11 attacks I have successfully prevented any public investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States.
* Removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any other president in U.S. history.
* In a little over two years created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided the U.S. has ever been since the Civil War.
* Entered office with the strongest economy in U.S. history and in less than two years turned every single economic category heading straight down.
Records and References
* At least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas driving record has been erased and is not available)
* AWOL from National Guard and deserted the military during a time of war.
* Refuse to take drug test or even answer any questions about drug use.
* All records of my tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away to my father's library, sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
* All records of any SEC investigations into my insider trading or bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
* All minutes of meetings for any public corporation I served on the board are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
* Any records or minutes from meetings I (or my VP) attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.
* For personal references please speak to my daddy or uncle James Baker (they can be reached at their offices of the Carlyle Group for war-profiteering.
A small tourist hotel was all abuzz about an afternoon wedding where the groom was 95 and the bride was 23.
The groom looked pretty feeble and the feeling was that the wedding night might kill him, because his bride was a healthy, vivacious young woman.
But lo and behold, the next morning, the bride came down the main staircase slowly, step by step, hanging onto the banister for dear life.
She finally managed to get to the counter of the little shop in the hotel. The clerk looked really concerned, “Whatever happened to you, honey? You look like you’ve been wrestling an alligator!”
The bride groaned, hung on to the counter and managed to speak, “Oh God! When he told me he’d been saving up for 75 years, I thought he meant his money!!”
A man went to his lawyer and said "I would like to make a will but I don't know exactly how to go about it."
The lawyer says "No problem, leave it all to me".
The man looks somewhat upset ... "Well I knew you were going to take the biggest slice, but I'd like to leave a little to my children too!
A father and his son go into the grocery store when they happen upon the condom aisle. The son asks his father why there are so many different boxes of condoms. The father replies, "Well, you see that 3-pack? That's for when you're in high school. You have 2 for Friday night and 1 for Saturday night."
The son then asks his father, "What's the 6-pack for?"
The father replies, "Well, that's for when you're in college. You have 2 for Friday night, 2 for Saturday night, and 2 for Sunday morning."
Then the son asks his father what the 12-pack is for.
The father replies, "Well, that's for when you're married. You have one for January, one for February, one for March, one for... "
What do you do with 365 used condoms?
Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.
Oh, you're just asking for it, aren't you? ROTFLMFAO
Hee Hee Hee
One day I'll tell my favorite joke...or maybe I'll tell you so you can post it.
Don't be so fu cking stupid Banasy.
The other blogs closed. Has nothing to do with trolls.
Get a clue.
Political Ticker.. closed
Marque.. closed
Light years.. closed.
The 're tard troll thinks GPS is closing down cause of him. That makes you as stupid as him.
Eat sh</I, you little nothing asshole. I know why they've all closed and gone on to the member account system.
Bush didn't "Bought an oil company" you liar. He borrowed 5 million dollars from Usama Bin Laden's and started "Arbusto Energy" and went on TV luring victims who all lost money investing in that little twerp.
He never paid Salim back the 5 mil, and Salim died in a freak plane crash near Houston.
GW Bush is an evil man and co-conspirator in the crime of 9/11. Swear to God he is.
*from OBLs brother Salim.
And Abe Lincoln WAS two faced and in more than these two ways:
1. One side of his face was so disfigured that children used to cry at seeing that tall monster and his grotesque face for the first time.
2.) He preferred sleeping with men and his favorite man friend owned many slaves.
During a recent vacation in Las Vegas, a man went to see a popular magic show. After one especially amazing feat, a man from the back of the theater yelled, "How'd you do that?" "I could tell you, sir", the magician answered, "But then I'd have to kill you." After a short pause, the man yelled back, "Ok, then... just tell my wife!"...
An amateur magician accidentally turns his wife into a loveseat and his two kids into armchairs. He starts to panic. He tries every trick in book but none work so, in desperation, he decides to take them to hospital. Once at the hospital, the magician spends a sleepless night while the medical staff run numerous tests on the unfortunate woman and children. Finally, the head doctor comes out into the corridor to speak to the magician. "How are my family?" he asks worriedly, "Are they alright?" The doctor replies, "they're comfortable..."
In a fancy Paris restaurant, there is a magical wish-granting mirror. But it only grants wishes if you tell the truth - if you lie, you disappear. One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead enter the restaurant and decide to try out the mirror. The brunette goes first. "I think I'm the smartest woman on earth." "POOF!" She disappears. The redhead goes up to try. "I think I'm the prettiest woman on earth." "POOF!" She disappears. The blonde goes up. "I think–" "POOF!
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says: "I'll give each of you just one wish." "Me first! Me first!, says the administration clerk. I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone. "Me next! Me next!, says the sales rep. I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone. "OK, you're up" the Genie says to the manager. The manager says: "I want those two back in the office after lunch." Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
I am a crowd. Odddd. Odddd.
I am having withdrawal symptoms.
Yes. Gw bad man. Bad man.
Two Men were out fishing when one decides to have a smoke He asks the other guy if he has a lighter He replies " Yes i do " and hands the other a 10 inch long BIC lighter Surprised the guy asks "Where did you get this?" The guy replies " Oh I have a personal genie" The first man asks "Can I make a wish?" Sure says the other man "Just make sure that you speak clearly cause he is a little hard at hearing" "Ok I will" says the other as he rubs the lamp a genie appears and asks the man what he wants The man says " I want a Million Bucks " The genie says OK and goes back to his bottle and 10 seconds later a million ducks fly over head And the guy says to the other " Your genie realy sucks at hearing doesnt He?" The other man replies "I know do you realy think I asked for a 10 inch BIC"
I think..poof.
Good one. Good one.
Odddd Odddd
I'm a crow.